September 17, 2018 at 4:31 am #4834
After consultations with my mental health team (I put a stethoscope on a neighborhood dog and set a notepad by his paws while he slept), I’ve been informed that I shouldn’t be a gosh darn bummer in my submission threads. This is a club! For mixers! Where is the levity? Where is the fun?
This newfound turn of optimism segues beautifully into the month of October. The one time that we claim to embrace our fears. Murderous hillbillies? Spooky. Ghosts? Also spooky. Ghouls? You damn well know that they spooky AF. It’s spooky fun times. I like the genre, I really do… but it all starts to feel a bit easy.
Have you watched any horror movies lately? Like the modern ones? Any major studio horror film has degenerated into assembly line, bloodless jump scares for 1 hour and 20 minutes. Nothing feels dangerous. You get a quick burst of adrenaline when the demon nun or whatever pops out of the shadows and then it’s over. You get spooked. But you’re never really afraid.
A lot of horror is simplistic. There is a bad thing, and it wants to kill everything. But real life is scarier than that. Real life is full of the kind of mundane, grinding anxiety that really keeps people up at night. I’m pretty sure that missing a mortgage payment is scarier than some mouthbreathing psycopath in coveralls will ever be. “Fear” is freeing. Fear is clean. It presents with you a challenge to be overcome. There is a narrative. You feel like you accomplished something. Envy the promiscuous teens. They either win, or they die. They don’t endure. Fight or flight, they get to know how their story ends.
The truly scary stuff exploits our very real anxieties. The Amityville Horror is a story about a mixed family. Rosemary’s Baby is about becoming a parent. Hellraiser is about whatever the hell is wrong with Clive Barker.
For October, you brave mixers are going to face your fears. Is it about confronting your failures at a certain profile? That sounds fun. Talk about it. Talk about what has failed in the past, and what you’re doing differently. Is it about a spooky profile? Spook away. Enjoy it. Goblin toes taste like anise you say? Cool. Just get creative. And feed me your fears.
As always, the themes are optional. Don’t face your fears. Submit whatever and continue to tremble whenever the lights flicker.
Submissions are due to our state-of-the-art Texas distribution center by the 15th of October. You probably want to get them in the mail by the 10th.
I wonder if that dog can adjust my medication?
October 8, 2018 at 9:48 pm #4847
INW Black Cherry for Pipe- .75%
INW Marzipan- .5%
INW Yes, We Cheesecake- 3%
FLV Granola- 1%
JF Strawberry Sweet- .5%
60/40, no Nic
Menu: Maybe a cherry cheesecake granola, but maybe a little more experimental than that.
There was a couple different things I wanted to do here. Mostly, I wanted to mix up my Bottom of the Hill recipe with Yes, We Cheesecake in place of CAP NY Cheesecake. That’s what I sat down to do. But then I thought that would just be silly. That one is already good how it is, so why not use the Yes Cheesecake to do something new. It’s still similar. There’s cheesecake, Marzipan, and a “for Pipe” flavor, but it’s different enough for me to still be pretty excited.
That was the initial thing I wanted to do. After I decided to go a different direction, I figured I’d throw some FLV Granola up in this bitch. Never used the flavor before, but it smelled interesting. So then I started thinking about those granola bars with the cheesecake stuff and all that. I don’t eat them, but it seemed like a fun thing to do.
I threw some JF Strawberry Sweet in there just to sweeten it up a bit. Not necessarily shooting for a Strawberry taste in there, but I do get it a little bit, but I don’t find that it’s out of place. Black Cherry for Pipe I’m using more for the Cherry part of the name than the “for Pipe” part of it. I would not call this recipe a tobacco recipe. Though if someone didn’t like it, it’s always nice to be able to fall back on the good ol “tobaccos aren’t for everyone excuse.” Can’t lose.
October 10, 2018 at 2:06 pm #4849
I have spent the better part of a year trying to get an apple dessert. I’ve given up in so many ways but this month brought it to life with as many different ways to hit the idea as I could. I Frankensteined one here with different flavors. This is the third round of adjustments so I am pretty half baked here. Hope there are some hits in this but here goes nothing…
1% (INW) 555 Gold
0.5% (TPA) Acetyl Pyrazine 5%
1% (HS) Apple Mix
1% (INW) Classic For Pipe Gold
0.5% (CAP) Double Apple
1.5% (HS) Elder Captain
2.5% (FA) Fuji
3% (DFS) HOLY HOLY GRAIL RY4
2% (TPA) Kentucky Bourbon
0.5% (FA) Liquid Amber
0.5% (TPA) Toasted Marshmallow
1.75% (WF) Vanilla Ruyan Custard
65/35 vg/pg, 15.75% flavor, 0mg
Tl;dr: it’s a cluster fuck nightmare in a bottle
I first tried HS apple mix/Fuji/LA at 2/2/1. It was there but not ‘enough’. I decided to add a touch of CAP apple x2 to help in the steep and round out the flavor adjusting the HS and Fuji to brighten/sweeten it up a bit since the rest was so dry. I probably should have added a hint of pear but decided against it because I wanted to milk the most out of the apple portion here.
VRYC seemed the obvious choice for a custard to pair with tobaccos. I tried it at 2%, then lowered it, then raised it a bit more.I hope it holds up of the long haul but is backed down enough to let the apples stand out a bit more. Originally I had bourbon in there higher to make a boozy custard, but decided to lower it to allow the apples to stay bright but stay to add sweet depth. Added toasted marshmallow to moisten up the mouthfeel (earlier was way too dry even for me) and sweeten it up a little knowing it pairs well with bourbon. Without a real crust here, I figured I would have to really invest in the thickening of the custard.
Since I couldn’t figure out how to do pie with tobaccos, I decided to try more like a golden nutty base. Hence the AP, the 555 Gold and the GFP. GFP was at a much higher percent before and got lowered to allow some more sweetness to shine through. Fingers crossed this doesn’t lose the tobacco totally.
While Vanilla for pipe might have been an obvious choice, I hadn’t tested it yet and also wanted some carmel-y added. Started with TFA ry4x2 but later changed that for some smoother HHry4 to accent the custard. HS Elder Captain was originally at 0.75% and got bumped up to 1.5% after last month’s Mixer’s Club test. I’m hoping that it’ll bring the clove spice while holding down some tobacco to fill in where GFP was lowered.
All feedback on this will be appreciated. Future generations depend on you. For science!!!
October 11, 2018 at 9:50 am #4850
FE KNT 2.5%
INW Tobacco Symphony 2.5%
FE Oriental 2%
FLV Milk & Honey 1.5%
FLV Wood Spice 0.5%
60/40 vg/pg, no nic
Menu Description: A savory and nutty tobacco leaf with a sweet creaminess
The word “sarcophagus” comes from the Greek σάρξ sarx meaning “flesh”, and φαγεῖν phagein meaning “to eat”, hence sarcophagus means “flesh-eating.” –Wikipedia
I haven’t touched tobaccos in forever. You shall be the guinea pig. KNT reminds me of TFA Western, without the weirdness. It has that robust savoriness that I find intriguing. It is easy to vape. It’s not quite soy sauce, but there’s something delicious about it. Maybe a tad salty? I guess it’s just another leafy variety, possibly a play on Kent cigarette tobacco. Tobacco Symphony is added for a smooth nuttiness, like peanuts. Oriental is actually pretty tame. I’m no tobacco expert, I think it adds a little complexity and lets you know this is tobacco forward.
I kept thinking about some kind of “base”, to avoid the tobaccos being too top-notey. I think Milk & Honey can help with that. It is creamy, sweet, and has some tasty dark sugar. Wood Spice was thrown in on a whim. It’s just another high quality FLV flavor to change things up. It sort of smells like an expensive cologne, but it’s not abrasive or alcoholey.
I don’t have that many tobaccos, kinda wish I had the FLV ones to play with. I hope you enjoy this one!
October 12, 2018 at 10:08 am #4851
Correction- Oriental is INW, not FE. It’s not the Tobacco Absolute, it just says “Oriental Tobacco”
October 13, 2018 at 2:36 pm #4852
0.4% – (FW) Blood Orange
0.4% – (FA) Bourbon (vanilla Bourbon)
3.5% – (VT) Fizzy Sherbet
0.07% – (FLV) Rich Cinnamon
0.25% – (CAP) Super Sweet
0.5% – (OTHR) WS-23
Menu Description – Cola made from scratch.
This month I was challenged to make a failure into a success. When I first started out I wanted to make a cola without using any “cola” flavors. Partially because I couldn’t find notes for anything spectacular, and partially because I wasn’t interested enough to buy such a niche flavor. So, I got to work on figuring this thing out. There were a few things that helped with my success here.
For starters, I bought about 200 more flavors since my first attempt, so I was no longer limited by what I had on hand originally. One of those flavors was VT Fizzy Sherbet, which is essential to this mix. It has enough of a citrus and fizzy effect to get on the right path. I started out with using it at 3% as a base, and then worked on bending it to my will.
I also started mixing by smell instead of using recommended percentages, so instead of having make numerous batches to adjust I could just build upon what was there. I know that method probably seems pretty obvious to some people, but I like numbers. I decided pretty early on that I didn’t want to chase “Coke” for a profile. I wanted to make something better. Something that doesn’t need to appeal to everyone. The end result is something that I’m very proud of, and I hope you enjoy it.
October 16, 2018 at 2:10 am #4853
Joy of Almonds
1.25% – (INW) Chocolate Cream
1% – (FA) Coco’ (coconut)
2.5% – (TPA) Coconut Candy
4% – (PUR) Cream Cheese Danish with Toasted Almonds
1% – (INW) Milk Chocolate
1% – (CAP) Super Sweet
.25% – (CAP) Vanilla Custard
Menu Description- An Almo(st)nd Joy vape
Notes: Chocolate is the weirdest thing I’ve ever tried mixing with, I was more than intimidated trying to figure this out. Almond Joys are one of my favorite candies, and I eat way to many of them this time of year.. So I thought why not vape them instead? The first problem I ran into was that all three profiles have on thing in common, they are all inherently bitter. I didn’t want to go up to 1% on sweetner, but the more I tested and thought about it, this is candy and I feel like if that much sweetner is ever called for it should be a candy vape. I started with higher percents on most of this recipe, but I decided I wanted to pull most of it back. I also started trying different creams to try to lighten up the chocolate, get it to meld with the coconut candy a bit more, and give it an even thicker mouth feel. I ran out of time trying the vanilla custard, but I think just that small amount may help smooth the whole thing over. This whole thing definitely taste a bit better after a weeks steep so you may want to come back to it if you hate it right when you get it (I mixed the sent bottles on the 10/12 just for refrence). I honestly never wanted to touch chocolate again after trying to mix this, but I’m really glad I tried this, even if it isn’t perfect it was great practice and helped me appreciate this group and how hard people before me have worked on recipes.
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